glutton

I have complained about my job before on here. Today, I'm going to complain again, and probably not for the last time, so fucking get used to it.

I work in an open studio, no cubicles, just desks. It's supposed to be a good environment for collaboration and sharing of ideas. Unfortunately, when my company moved into this space 3 years ago, they didn't spend a single dime to decorate it or fix it up or anything. What does that mean? It means industrial grade fluorescent lights, stark matte white walls and a matching white cement ceiling with a grey indoor/outdoor rug. Nice collaborative environment, huh?

It seems that they're too fucking cheap to buy a couple of gallons of paint and a couple of nice light fixtures. The reason it's dark in here is because fluorescent lighting sucks. No one will turn the lights on because it glares on the computer screens, and the quality of the lighting is piss poor. Do you have fluorescent lights in your living room? Of course you fucking don't.

The worst part is that I think I may be getting S.A.D.. The thing you have to understand is that we've been in this sterile shithole of a space for 3 years now and not a single iota of effort has been made to make it better. What does that mean? You guessed it! Management couldn't give two shits what the environment we work in is like. And why would they? They have offices with windows and doors!

Knowing all of this, I sent this email to the boss today:

Boss –

I am seeing that the lighting in the studio is a bit of an issue in the office…

For about $275 and a couple of hours of an electrician’s time, we could install something like this IKEA wire lighting 1 or this IKEA wire lighting 2.

This may be a good solution to get rid of the ugly fluorescents. Each person can aim the light according to their taste, and I think you can have up to 5-7 lights per string. So you could technically have two lights per desk, and one in the center of the studio, plus lights over the printer and the front cabinets, if needed.

This is just a suggestion. There are hundreds of inexpensive lights like this on the market.

- Grumpy

What the fuck am I thinking? I hate my job, I hate the environment here, and then I go on like I fucking give a shit about my coworkers' well being and fucking comfort.

Nothing good can possibly come of this. Either it will be dismissed by management because "electricians are expensive" or because "now isn't a good time financially". You can't spend $275, what the fuck kind of business are you running here??

The other way I can see this going is that it will become my project. "OK Grumpy, you want fancy lights? Then you do all the legwork, you price them and you buy them. And oh, by the way, we can't hire an expensive electrician, so you're going to have come in on the weekend and install them yourself. Hope that's OK."

Either way, I'm a fucking glutton for punishment.

Update: It would seem that prediction #2 is coming true. The lights have become my pet project. Aren't I a lucky fuck? So now, I have to get 'buy in" from the other two employees here, go to IKEA and buy the stupid fucking lights.

When the boss came to my desk to say it was a good idea, I asked, "Oh yeah, what about the electrician?"
"Um, do we really need an electrician?"
"Yeah, wouldn't it be nice if you could turn the lights on and off using the switch on the wall?"
"Oh, right, good point."
At the risk of sounding repetative, he fucking graduated from Stanford!! Twice!!!

So they're going to hire an electrician as soon as I drive my lazy ass to IKEA.

The best was when I talked to our other two employees about it and one of them says to me, "Thanks for stealing our idea. We suggested that three years ago, fucker."

Great, guess I'll be getting that buy in any day now...