mr. f

Got this little email gem from Mr. Freelancer yesterday:

(blah blah blah)

Grumpy, just curious what you will be contributing the presentation.

(blah blah blah)

It's amazing how one line out of a very long-winded email can really go up your ass sideways. This single line really put me over the edge yesterday. Luckily Belinda talked me back from the brink before I went off and did something stupid.

You see, the Boss has decided that Mr. Freelancer would make a good project manager even though he has never worked as a consultant in his life. I don't know why anyone would do this, but here we are, and now our three-member project team is working for him.

I will save you from all the gory details, but on Friday, we talked at length, in a subdued but heated tone, about what I and the other two team members would be doing for the presentation. I don't really understand why it was necessary to send me an email on Monday asking me what I would be doing. Perhaps he killed those brain cells over the weekend?

Here is the response that Belinda saved me from sending:

Mr. F,

I was planning on doing EXACTLY what we discussed on Friday for the presentation. Has something changed that I haven't been notified about?

Grumpy

It's a little bitchy. I might describe it as underhanded bitchy. But that pissant bitch deserved it, the fucker. Belinda and I discussed writing a nice professional response to this. She gave me an excellent suggestion on how to craft a response that was short, sweet, not bitchy, and wouldn't get me fired. But I can't remember a single thing she told me to write since I am so blinded with rage whenever I try to start the response to this email. Instead, I have decided to ignore it, and send no response at all. Pretend I never got it.

Our little 3-person team is toiling away nicely here in the office today without Mr. F. I'm sure he will be in tomorrow. Throwing his weight around as if he actually knew what he was doing. I can guarantee that I will be in a sour mood tomorrow afternoon.